I am surprised to note as I write this that I have a happy tear in each eye. I am currently listening to the "Lord of the Dance" theme from Michael Flatley's show by the same name. I am quite fond of Lord of the Dance - in fact, in my opinion the only thing that is wrong with that show is Michael Flatley himself. Figures that the man who is arguably the world's greatest Irish dancer would also be a slimeball. Fortunately for me, the first time I saw this show performed was at Epcot (I guess technically that should be EPCOT) Center at Disneyworld, FL. Well actually it was only excerpts from the show, but it was way cool, and most importantly it was Lord of the Dance sans Mr. Flatley. I have a very distinct memory of wishing that Thea was there with me. Which was silly, of course, since I'd known for several years at that point that Thea and I wouldn't work out. But believe it or not the Disney Boardwalk (where we were staying) is an incredibly romantic location - I would definitely be happy having my honeymoon there. Actually I want to have my honeymoon there. So you can see perhaps how it made me think of Thea, who is one of only two girls in the world whose scent I still remember. I miss my Dragon Girls. I definitely feel like God has separated our life paths deliberately, but sometimes I miss them all the same. It would be nice to go back two or three years for one more movie date with Princess, back to when I didn't feel uncomfortable hugging girls I was fond of - and when I didn't feel the need for hugs quite so acutely.
It's funny to think that at Stanford nobody has replaced Thea and Princess. I guess I sort of figured deep down inside that I'd always have my Dragon Girls to turn to. But even deeper down I guess I knew that part of growing up would mean that they and I would go our separate ways. As I said in my speech at the 2000 senior breakfast, "Some of our classmates will become faces at a high school reunion, some school rivals, and some total strangers." Well, neither of them have become school rivals. I hope they become faces at a reunion instead of total strangers.
That wasn't at all where I intended this post to go, but I'll leave it standing because the Dragon Girls form an important part of my life history and after all the purpose of this blog is to acquaint you with the parts of me that you wouldn't otherwise get acquainted with. However, the purpose of this blog is not to rant. I am not down with ranting or venting in public, and I definitely consider the Internet to be a public place. If I wanted to rant in writing, why not take out a piece of paper or open up Word? No, if I ranted on a blog it could only be for one reason: because I wanted other people to see it. But if I've got something to say to another person I should say it to him or her in private, not to you. I am thinking specifically of the following line in my last entry:
Not the best the group is theoretically capable of doing, mind you, but our directors aren't stringent enough with us (and our coffers aren't full enough) to permit us to record the best we're theoretically capable of.
Now, that was plain unacceptable. It wasn't right for me to use this space to express my dissatisfaction with parts of core's directorship, and thoroughly at odds with my behavior outside of this blog. So I apologize.
I am very close to finishing my work for this quarter. I should be done with Reading & Writing Poetry by the end of the day (only four more anthology pages and then I'm through, except for possibly a revision of the open form poem I wrote just now), and then there's just another two or three hours or classics reading. Once I'm done with that I'll just have my Greek and classics finals. Fortunately I have gotten back into "it's time for me to be at Stanford" mode. But in a little over a week I'll definitely be back in "it's time for me to be home" mode, and won't that feel good?