tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3321402.post116588210974334236..comments2023-09-18T01:46:27.105-07:00Comments on Speaking Natalie: Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3321402.post-1166419395432108302006-12-17T21:23:00.000-08:002006-12-17T21:23:00.000-08:00God puts people in our lives to help us discover H...God puts people in our lives to help us discover His will, and we serve that same purpose in other's lives. That includes NSSOs, friends, spouses, enemies ... everyone. While spouses don't have the "right" to leave, neither does anyone else (at least, not those who live by following Jesus), because our actions should be dictated by finding His will, not by imposing our own, whether it be selfishly or collaboratively. To me, an NSSO is special because that is someone with whom, at least for a season, you can engage in a collaborative discovery of His will. The romantic bond must be there, but it must not be the essence of the relationship. The essence is in the collaborative discovery of His will for your individual and joint life. How well you do that IS indeed an important measure of the relationship.Oswell55https://www.blogger.com/profile/16086143697523976111noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3321402.post-1166238063317805812006-12-15T19:01:00.000-08:002006-12-15T19:01:00.000-08:00WTB Spouse Divining Rod, PSTWTB Spouse Divining Rod, PSTJukahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05009920062239365034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3321402.post-1165961109156180732006-12-12T14:05:00.000-08:002006-12-12T14:05:00.000-08:00PS"[An NSSO] someone along to walk with you the ha...PS<BR/>"[An NSSO] someone along to walk with you the hard adventurous road of finding out who your spouse is going to be..."<BR/><BR/>Er...You make her sound like a divining rod. Presumably the purpose of an NSSO is to determine if you are going to marry <I>her</I>...*not* to determine the identity of someone else. *wink*Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3321402.post-1165960706405115542006-12-12T13:58:00.000-08:002006-12-12T13:58:00.000-08:00"...an NSSO...is a co-adventurer in romantic obedi..."...an NSSO...is a co-adventurer in romantic obedience...to walk with you the hard adventurous road of finding out who your spouse is going to be...seems to entail quite a lot of growing and learning. There are marriage-like elements to this...But it is not marriage." <BR/><BR/>There *is* a lot growing and learning to be had here, certainly...But it's not just about growing together. Having an NSSO by your side -- someone that you love & trust, and whose judgement, and ability to assess situations you respect -- is also about having a safe place for *you* to grow & learn as an *individual.* <BR/><BR/>I don't actually mean a haven, because that implies a specific location...More like...an aura. To speak in gaming/fantasy terms, she should radiate a "glow" -- a safety spell of her love -- that guards you while you do your thing. In this way you are protected as she sets you free to find your wings, confident that if you falter she will support you.<BR/><BR/>The difference between an NSSO and a spouse is that the latter doesn't have a binding obligation to stay and support you if you do something (or a series of somethings) egregious, frightening, or, even merely if the spark fades. But if you are going to be in any sort of serious dating relationship, especially one looking towards the possibility of marriage, one shouldn't post that relationship under a flag of, "It's okay, we can quit whenever we want to." This is not make believe and one shouldn't play at pretending to keep a lover, a house, or anything else.<BR/><BR/>... <BR/><BR/>I mean, society has shown it *is* possible to have two selves -- the Real You/Self and the Dating You/Self, and they don't always act in conjunction or grow along side one another. Right? It is possible for one's Dating Self to foster a relationship that isn't *exactly* what one would want for the Real You. It is also possible for the Real Self to take a negative path under a successful and otherwise happy Dating Self/relationship (think UB/AI). It is when these two selves are symmetrical -- when the Dating You and the Real You are balanced and inline with Scripture -- that a *real* union soars. <BR/><BR/>To reach that point, however, it is not enough to simply walk the "hard [and] adventurous road" together. You must foster each other's growth throughout the journey, stopping to check your bearings, plot your courses (note the plural there), and do any necessary mending & healing of your souls. Out of this, you will see your relationship blossom as you travel [grow] alongside one another, together. As the classroom has proven time and again, it is often when students don't know they're learning that they learn best. <I>That</I> is to have an NSSO.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3321402.post-1165904308334253712006-12-11T22:18:00.000-08:002006-12-11T22:18:00.000-08:00very well said indeed, nabterayl!this should be ca...very well said indeed, nabterayl!<BR/><BR/>this should be carved into stone somewhere using margaret, the righteous aug of justice!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com